Wonder Park: Far from it

Wonder Park (2019) • View trailer 
One star. Rated PG, despite quite scary sequences
By Derrick Bang • Originally published in The Davis Enterprise, 3.15.19

This animation misfire is a total disaster.

Actually, it’s worse than that. I’ve been bored, nauseated, disgusted and repulsed by bad films over time, but only rarely do stinkers prompt the degree of hostility that swelled exponentially, as Wonder Park slogged to its conclusion.

June is delighted to discover that one of her favorite stuffed toys is a living, talking blue
bear in the parallel realm where her fantasy theme park also is real. Too bad her joy is
about to be shattered by a relentless hoard of chattering zombie monkeys...

To paraphrase the title from one of Roger Ebert’s books, I hated, hated, hated this film.

The premise is hopelessly weird, the execution deeply flawed. Mind you, we’re talking about a medium that has successfully made heroes of gourmet rats, frost-generating princesses, and dogs struggling to survive on an island of trash.

I’m surprised Josh Appelbaum, André Nemec and Robert Gordon are willing to acknowledge having written this clumsy, incoherent, ill-conceived mess. I can’t imagine how the initial elevator pitch would have gone. What in the world could have prompted Paramount execs to believe this notion ever could have been made into a coherent film?

We’re talkin’ irredeemable stinker, folks.

The story, such as it is:

June Bailey (voiced by Brianna Denski), a precocious young genius probably destined for an engineering career, loves amusement parks. She and her mother (Jennifer Garner) have spent years sketching out the ultimate fantastical theme park, filled with delightfully crazy rides. They call it Wonder Park, and its pretend “ambassadors” — who “put the ‘wonder’ in Wonder Park” — are June’s assortment of stuffed animals.

But here’s the thing: Every outrageous new ride that June whispers into the ear of her stuffed monkey, Peanut, is heard and instantly fabricated by a living, breathing Peanut, who — in some alternate universe — is the magical architect of an actual Wonder Park. Which is stuffed with happy human patrons, who aren’t the slightest bit fazed to be hosted by a talking monkey (Norbert Leo Butz) and counterparts of June’s other stuffed critters: Greta, a wild boar (Mila Kunis); Boomer, a narcoleptic blue bear (Ken Hudson Campbell); Steve, the porcupine safety officer (John Oliver); and beaver brothers Gus and Cooper (Kenan Thompson and Ken Jeong).

Ohhhhh-kay. This is a stretch. Probably an impossible one, but we gotta roll with it.

(As the story proceeds, there’s a strong echo of the real-world/fantasy-world divide in The LEGO Movie, which feels a bit like copycatting.)

The Grinch: Hardly a bad banana with a greasy black peel

The Grinch (2018) • View trailer 
3.5 stars. Rated PG, for no particular reason
By Derrick Bang • Originally published in The Davis Enterprise, 11.9.18

Dr. Seuss purists who still shudder at the memory of 2000’s live-action Jim Carrey fiasco can rest easy. 

Once the Grinch decides to ruin Whoville's Christmas once and for all, he realizes that
stealth infiltration will be most successful if he's disguised as Santa Claus. Cue a
furious sewing session on an elaborate machine powered by his dog, Max.

Illumination — the animation studio that brought us the Minions — has done well by its 21st century revival of the modest 1957 picture book, which took a savvy poke at Christmas over-commercialization … eight years before Charlie Brown and his little tree.

The Grinch retains most of what was important about both that 69-page children’s classic, and the 1966 Chuck Jones adaptation that remains must-see TV every December. It’s evident from this film’s opening montage: a swooping camera shot that descends — accompanied by a gentle instrumental cover of the familiar “Fahoo Foraze” — from snow-covered mountains into the heart of Whoville.

The little town bustles with the expectation of Christmas, only a few days away. Decorations spring up on homes and in streets, thanks to elaborate, marvelously crazed, physics-challenged Seussian gadgets, doohickeys, widgets, doodads, gizmos, thingamajigs and thingamabobs: everything from wobbly garland hangers and improbable candy cane twirlers, to a Zamboni-esque contraption that scoops up snow drifts and excretes neatly stacked pyramids of perfectly formed snowballs, for young Whovians to throw at each other.

By which point, we viewers can’t help smiling.

Our appreciation redoubles as the narration begins, with scripters Michael LeSieur and Tommy Swerdlow retaining and expanding upon the original book’s text, the new material capturing the same Seussian rhyming scheme. 

Such enhancements feel reasonably organic: Little Cindy Lou Who (voiced by Cameron Seely) now is the daughter of a hard-working single mother, Donna Lou (Rashida Jones), who also rides herd over rambunctious infant twins; and the scowly-growly Grinch (Benedict Cumberbatch) must contend with his nearest neighbor, Bricklebaum (Kenan Thompson), an ebullient, joyous, irrepressible fellow who — insufferably! — believes that they’re good friends.

In so many ways, producer (and Illumination founder) Chris Meledandri, directors Scott Mosier and Yarrow Cheney, and their massive animation team have done their best to honor the source material. No surprise, since Illumination also delivered 2012’s delightful adaptation of Dr. Seuss’ The Lorax.